Tinder pickup line for humor article

Shoot your shot. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take? This didn't work at all

Hey :)

We’ve all been there before. After a day and a half of sleeping, watching Fortnite compilations and taking Harry Potter house quizzes, you remember; “I haven’t been on Tinder at all.” 

You open the app and wow, seven new matches, unprecedented. Since you’re no simp, you'll message every single one of them. But you’ve already used all four of your hacky unoriginal pickup lines. Well, you’re in luck my friend. I’ve generated some more hacky unoriginal pick lines so you don’t have to do the work.

1. Hey, uh, are you from Tennessee? Cause you look like you would make out with your cousin.

Ah yes, the old bait and switch. Any time you take a corny, overused pickup line and jazz it up with a backhanded compliment, sure to have people lining up at your door.

2. Are you an RN? because my family member is having a stroke. Please help.

A personal favorite of mine. If quality time is your love language and you want to initiate contact immediately then this is a sure-fire go-to.

3. I’m pregnant and it’s yours.

Do you want someone who’s responsible? Someone who takes care of you? Weed out all the slackers and quitters with this attention getter.

4. Are you an electrician? Because you’re definitely lighting up my night!

My mother and father’s second date was my mother watching my father’s company softball game. He was playing catcher. He is also an electrician. Let’s hope they stay together.

5. Are you a pile of trash? Cause I wanna take you out.

Not much to say here. It sounds like an insult and makes it sweet. It’s like a reverse backhanded compliment. A forehanded compliment.

6. How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice. Hi, I’m dying on the inside

Zoomers love this type of humor. I don’t know what it is. But it works.

7. Hey, are you Cher Lloyd? Cause somebody doesn’t know how to flush the toilet after they’ve had a seat.

A true classic that’s served me well time and time again. It’s got it all. Vine reference, toilet humor and it indicates that you’re here to just have fun.

With that being said, I’d like to wish you luck. The odds are stacked against you. The male-to-female ratio on tinder is 9:1, and the fact you’re taking advice from a 19-year-old comedian who can’t grow facial hair is not a great sign.

But hey, why fret? At least from what it seems, true love seems to be a real thing. People find it all the time. Just stick it out. You got it. Maybe write some of your own pickup lines. Or maybe don’t use pickup lines, just be genuine. Or not. Who knows?

(0) comments

Welcome to the discussion.

Keep it Clean. Please avoid obscene, vulgar, lewd, racist or sexually-oriented language.
PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK.
Don't Threaten. Threats of harming another person will not be tolerated.
Be Truthful. Don't knowingly lie about anyone or anything.
Be Nice. No racism, sexism or any sort of -ism that is degrading to another person.
Be Proactive. Use the 'Report' link on each comment to let us know of abusive posts.
Share with Us. We'd love to hear eyewitness accounts, the history behind an article.